Are you going to pieces from dealing with parenting and studying at the same time? I used to be like that once, combining the duties of a mother and a student. But a high dissatisfaction with life and chronic fatigue made me think that I should do something with my life to be a healthy and caring mother.
Keeping the balance between family and other duties is an important part of a happy life. You need to keep it to feel the pleasure of being a mother, and to feel the value of being a useful member of society. Do you want to know how to lead a harmonious life and get off that hamster wheel? Try out the following tips I successfully tested on my own.
- Define your goals and set priorities.
It may sound too serious, but you need to understand what you want to do with your life and what to achieve. Why have you decided to get a college degree? Or, why do you need this work? What is the most important: family, work, or studying? As a mother, you can’t deny that family and children play a great role in your life, and it’s important not to lose the connection with them. You need to accept this fact and build your life in accordance with it. Let’s be honest, it’s great when you can see the smiles of your family and be sure that everything you do makes both you and them happy.
- Plan your time.
You may be wondering, but many mothers skip this valuable tool as a day planner. It may seem unnecessary, as you already know when you need to clean your house or feed your child. But a certain schedule will help you keep up with all planned activities, leave a more meaningful life, and make the life of your closest one easier.
With a planner, you won’t forget about the upcoming deadline of your paper, an important meeting, or taking your child to ballet class. Become the master of your own life! Create a schedule that will allow you to do all of the important things and avoid drowning in daily tasks.
Use Google Calendar or a paper version – a notebook. Get into the habit of writing a list of tasks for the upcoming day. It’s better to do it in the evening when you can assess the effectiveness of the day. Also, set the priorities of the tasks and the possibility of rescheduling them for another time.
- Make time for rest – every day.
Constantly working and dealing with various tasks will wipe you out emotionally and physically. It may result in depression and other psychological problems. Even if you feel productive, chronic fatigue syndrome may come to you at any time. That’s why you need to take breaks during the day. No matter whether you are at home, at work, or deep in study – you need to set at least several 20-minute breaks. During this period you need to completely relax and free your brain from thoughts connected to the daily routine. Choose an activity that calms you down: take a bath, go for a walk to the nearest park, have a drink of warm tea, or meditate.
Depending on your well-being, try to incorporate physical exercises at least twice a week. Regular exercises will help you succeed in different spheres of life. There is no need to spend hours in a gym or to run a marathon.
- Find a role model.
Just look around. Do you have any friends or relatives who are loving parents and yet keep their lives under control? Try to learn by their example and ask them how they deal with their daily tasks if possible. Also, you can read the biographies of famous women who successfully combine motherhood and career – maybe you will find interesting tips and advice.
- Stay close to the academic community.
Remember that good communication will help you succeed both at college and work. Connect with the students from your course to be up to date with all the news in college and receive help if necessary. Also, don’t forget to foster a good relationship with your mentor. This will increase your chances to avoid common mistakes and troubles that average college students face.
- Don’t refuse help.
If your plans go down the tube, be sure to have a backup plan. Get in contact with a babysitter or ask your parents to sit with the children if you urgently need to do important work or leave for an important meeting. Or if you can’t find time for college assignments, you can use a cheap essay writing service and remain confident that you won’t fail the course. Always say “yes” to those who offer help with work, studying, or kids. It’s great to be a self-sufficient woman, but this doesn’t mean that you need to totally sacrifice yourself.
- Learn to say “No.”
As mothers, we frequently assume too many responsibilities and let our children walk over us. This doesn’t mean that you need to turn from a caring mother into a military lieutenant. Maybe its time to teach your toddler to dress themselves, or for the older children to help around the house. Read some information on how to do this with less harm to their psyche. You can turn everything into an enjoyable process.
Also, if your children are old enough, accustom them to the thought that mom shouldn’t be disturbed when she is busy with studies or work. Arrange your personal workplace, or a corner where you can feel private. Start with a short time (such as 15 minutes) and then gradually move to a longer time.
Talk with your husband and discuss the household chores. Maybe it will be better if he goes for the weekly shopping by himself or sits with children at certain hours. Communication is the key to success.
- Give yourself a little slack.
The ideal mother is a myth, so just bear with it. It’s nearly impossible to be a caring mother and a good student at the same time. You may feel disappointed that the results of the exam are not high enough, or feel guilty that you spend less time with your children. We are all people, and it’s normal that we fail to do some things. Be a realistic person and perceive every failure as a life lesson. Enjoy your life, love your children, and know that being a working or studying mother is an art.
Just remember that you are a brave woman if you have decided to combine motherhood and college or work. Take care of yourself, love your family, and set ambitious targets. We believe you will do the best!
Nicky Quinton is a professional writer and blogger. With more than 7 years of experience, she has collaborated on different educational projects including educational WritingCheap. Nicky is writing a book that is going to see the light of day by the end of 2019.